A New Year

It’s been a long time since I’ve greeted a new year with resounding gusto.  Usually, I’m smiling and kissing my hubby while simultaneously feeling guilty about all that wasn’t achieved that year.  I thought I would be heading into 2015 doing a victory dance because I FINALLY conquered that thing that kept rolling from year to year.  Instead, it was sort of half-celebration.  It seems I’ve only achieved partial victory, after all.

So, January 1st was a battle for me.  I spent most of the day feeling depressed.  How can a person feel so sure of where they stand, only to discover that position is a few poor decisions away from feeling like she’s back to square one?  My answer to that question is another question.  Has my reality actually been changed by my recent decisions?  If not, then I know I’m fighting a battle of the mind… a battle of perspective, which was true in my case.  I finally dragged myself into God’s Word at the end of the day.

I read Genesis 1-3, the story of creation and the fall.  In the middle of my struggling, God shared two things with me.

–  When God says something, it happens, and He says it is good.  That is truth I can stand on.  So, when He has begun a good work in me and I feel that I’ve undone it all within a week, is that true?  Truth says, “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” (Philippians 1:6)

– Secondly, the Lord showed me something interesting that I hadn’t considered before.  This is what Genesis 2 says about the Garden of Eden: “Now the Lord God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed.”  The thing I hadn’t considered before was that God had placed Adam and Eve in a defined space.  It’s true, God had given them the mandate to multiply, fill, and subdue the earth, but Adam and Eve He had placed in the garden.  They knew where they belonged and what their responsibilities were.  That all changed with the Fall.  After they sinned, God sent them into the whole world.  What then, was their defined space to fill and subdue?  To me, this seems like the very beginning of New Year’s Resolutions.  Man looking to make a difference in his own life and the lives around him… but we so often over-promise and under-deliver.  We don’t know anymore where we belong or what our responsibilities are, so we try to subdue the whole stinkin’ earth!  No wonder we are overworked and stressed out, and often feeling, like I have for so many years, that another year has gone by without having achieved those elusive goals.

So, what am I doing with these two thoughts in light of the discouragement that I was facing yesterday?  I’m praying, Lord, I do know that the work you began in me in 2014 is something You will complete.  It’s Your work, and it’s good.  I can trust You even when I don’t trust myself.  Secondly, I am being thoughtful about the year to come.  We live in the big, wide world, with so many opportunities and needs.  We need the Lord to define our gardens for the coming year.  I’m praying, Lord, if there is anything you want to add or subtract from my life in 2015, show me!  In the mean time, help me to continue in what You’ve already been doing.

Happy {blessed and anointed, directed and purposeful} New Year to you all.